You don’t understand love, you’re just a stupid little kid.” And with that, she turned and ran into her house.I stood there, bewildered, before finally walking next door.The next night, as I was lying in bed, I heard a tapping at my window. I went to investigate and discovered Christie there, with a bottle of vodka in her hand, and in a foul mood. “Mike is a jerk!”“Ummmmm.” I didn’t want to piss her off again. “What happened?”“’Spend more time with my friends’, my ass!!!! That fucker was. I bought a dead-stupid cell phone. It wasn't a Blackberry. It wasn't an Iphone. It wasn't an Android. It had caller-ID and a large keypad. Next I called my Illinois apartment's landlord and opened negotiations to break my contract for a minimum fee.I ordered a shipping container to be dropped off at the apartment complex. For five hundred bucks the maintenance guys would strip the place for me and pack the goods. When they called to inform me that they were finished I'd call a shipping agent to. You’ll be able to in a few years when you’ve practiced it as long as I have.’‘What do you mean by a few years, aren’t I one of your kind already?’‘Of course you are but when you become as old as I am, you’ll start to appreciateyour new way of life,’ she replied in a dictatorial fashion.‘And how old is that?’‘Four and a half thousand years.’‘What?!!!’ I exclaimed almost coughing over my bourbon. ‘Say that again?’11‘I’m four and a half, give or take a few years, thousand years old, my. As I walk back to my house, I pass by one of Kimber’s girlfirends, Echo. “Good morning Echo.” I say smiling to her as I pass by. Over the course of the day I am helping my mom out around the house to keep myself occupied. Finally, 5 pm. I run up to my room and put on my favorite white dress with heels. I walk outside to get in my car and there is a limo sitting outside my house. “Hey girl, come on figured you might like a limo for your date!” Kimber yells coming out from the back. I run up.
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